we are in the car, simone and i. she had just completed the Yes! course of Art of Living Foundation, a four-day course tailored for teens (meditation and yoga, as well as age-appropriate issues self-esteem, peer pressure, etc., are tackled). Simone is not yet a teen--she'll turn 13 in June--but, according to her tita dona (and i totally agree), Sim has been through much in her young life. her emotions, questions about God, and outlook surpass most kids'.
she is visibly exhausted. her hair, matted by sweat from the 36-degree-Celsius heat outside (and from doing 40 full rounds of surya namaskaras), sticks to the contours of her face. the car's aircon is a relief.
"mommy, what makes people hate other people?"
the question floors me, because the answers seem so obvious. because people hurt each other. they lie, cheat, steal. they backbite and connive to take power away from one another; they snatch away what the other loves and values; they are selfish.
what i tell her, though, is different. "we hate when we feel the other is apart from us, outside of us. different from us. not part of what we love, our experience, our life." i try to figure out where this is coming from, and i realize Sim has so much to learn.
"did they teach you about the God consciousness, that everything is One?"
"no, not really..." she says.
"that God's love makes us One. my consciousness is a part of yours, and yours, mine, and mine, Ranie's (the driver's), his, yours. when we feel apart from that One-ness, we hate."
she nods. "yeah, i think i understand."
dozens more thoughts and words run through my head, but they're too quick for me to catch and express out loud.
so instead: "what did you feel during meditation? did you cry?" she told me earlier that one of her classmates had cried.
"i have no problems."
i find this surprising. i'm beaming inside, but i'm wondering: "you don't consider not knowing your dad a problem?"
"no. i just don't care."
"whoa. that's worse than hating."
"no, i care," she explains. "i'd care if he got hurt. or if something happened to him. but i just...don't...care."
my daughter may still have many more questions to ask, and things to learn, but i think she's pretty much okay where she is.
8 years ago